Thankful Through Grieving

I will admit I am feeling a little less grateful this Thanksgiving than I have felt in the past. Although I am truly grateful for so many blessings, there is still a void in my life. What I would give to feel those old familiar enthusiastic holiday feelings, but instead it feels like I am standing out in the cold, watching through a window while everyone else enjoys the warmth and togetherness of the holiday season. 

God has blessed me with wonderful friends and family. He has also blessed Luke with the best Thanksgiving he could ever have and for that I am grateful but he isn’t here and it hurts more than anyone can imagine. My family feels incomplete. 

Luke always loved my homemade chocolate pie and he isn’t here to enjoy it this year and to tell me,” Mom, this is the best chocolate pie ever!”. Although he isn’t missing out because chocolate pie is nothing to compared to heaven, we are the ones missing out. 

First Thessalonians 5:18 says to be thankful IN all circumstances. We are not told to be thankful FOR everything in our lives. We are not expected to give thanks for loss and brokenness. However, the capacity lies within us to be thankful IN those dark times. That little preposition makes a big difference.

How and why should we give thanks in broken times? Witnessing grief is difficult, but I find that joy and beauty are never far away. Even during our darkest days, there is beauty. Even in times of despair, there are reasons to be thankful.

Giving thanks does not take away all our pain and struggles, but it points us to the light in a time of darkness. Identifying reasons to be thankful gives glimmers of hope and strength to keep going.

Although this is the first Thanksgiving without our my precious Luke, I have to be a witness and a role model for Jake, my other son. This is also the first holiday that he can remember without his brother. So I have to show him how to be thankful IN all circumstances. He also LOVES my chocolate pie! So I will put my best face forward and ask God for strength this Thanksgiving and try to show my family what it looks like to be thankful in dark times. 

We face hard times in our lives, and none of us will escape grief. But it is not a journey without joy. And you do not have to find “closure” or end grief before you can experience that joy. You do not have to have everything going right in your life in order to be thankful IN any situation.

Whether your Thanksgiving is quiet or rambunctious, may you find peace in giving thanks.

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