Luke, Oh I wish you were here with us this Christmas but instead you are spending your first Christmas in heaven. Although I miss you so, so, so very much, it brings me peace to know that you are having the best Christmas ever! I can only imagine the worship in heaven can’t compare to ours down here. Spending Christmas with Christ himself would be better than anything I could give you wrapped under the tree, but how my heart longs for you to be here with me.
When the world around me is filled with joy and smiling family photos, the fact that I’m missing part of mine, makes the hole feel even bigger. It’s been over six months since your life began in heaven and you would be 11 years old now. Some people pretend you never lived and they don’t mention your name very much anymore. Do people realize the gift they give me when they speak your name? I love to talk about you and there is never a day that I don’t mention your name. I can’t tell you how many times a day I think of you and always wonder what you are doing in heaven.
I will never stop saying your name, Luke or you would say, “ no Mom, LukeStrong.” You are a part of me. I carry you with me wherever I go. I and the ones who fell so deeply in love with you the short time you were here will never ever forget you. I wouldn’t trade all the pain and all the trauma, for a life of never knowing you. You were worth every second.
I am picture you with a head full of blonde hair fixed just the way you liked it, cancer free, full of energy and joy beyond what we could ever imagine here on earth. This Christmas you are worshiping Jesus at his throne in total perfection and wholeness. It brings me peace to know how great you are feeling right now physically and emotionally. Not only are you ok, but you are better and more full of life than ever before.
I wonder is it snowing on the streets of gold? Are the mansions white? Are you fishing in the river that is crystal clear flowing from the throne of God and of the lamb (Jesus) down the middle of the city? On each side of the river is there a tree of life, yielding twelve kinds of fruit every month. Are the streets pure gold, like transparent glass. Are the walls of the city adorned with every kind of jewel, emerald, onyx, amethyst, topaz, etc. Is there no need for a sun or moon, and no need for a temple or church because the presence of the Lord is your light? Do you ride your 4-wheeler through beautiful rain forests with animals all around you?
I can only imagine but I do know this…..However, the real beauty of heaven is this:
“Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away…I am making everything new.”3
We all went to the cemetery and placed a Christmas tree at your headstone. I put deer ornaments and Captain America shields on your tree. Scout also came with us and sat by your grave. You would be so proud of how well he is doing, Luke.
Merry Christmas my sweet Luke. Love and miss you very much! Everyday is one day closer I will get to see you and Jesus face to face and oh what a glorious day that will be!
